12 Pounds Too Heavy

I went to the doctor a few weeks ago for my annual physical. Everything checked out great - my weight is within medically acceptable range for my height, my hemoglobin A1c is normal - great news for a diabetic like me! - and all of my blood serum levels are where they should be, although my sodium was on the low side (what's your theory, Trekkies?). Yes, my cholesterol is great, my blood pressure was perfect, my hypothyroidism is well controlled...and the doctor's scale showed a 12 pound difference than my bathroom scale.

12 pounds. (That's 5.4 kg to the world beyond my country's borders). I'm stand about 5' 5-1/2" (166 cm), so that is a significant number to anyone, but especially to a woman who is extraordinarily conscious about her health and body image. 12 pounds. A few years back, after a serious illness that led to tremendous weight gain, I spent nine months working my butt off (quite literally) to get back to a healthy weight. 12 pounds. I do cardio five days a week, plus weight training two days a week to build and maintain a healthy level of muscle mass. 12 pounds. I eat a plant-based diet, with meat and dairy as accompaniments to a meal instead of the main course and I monitor both my caloric and nutrient intake, balancing my plate with good fats, low-sugar carbs, resistant starch, and lean proteins. 12 pounds.

12 pounds. I'm still the same person I was before I saw that number on the doctor's regularly calibrated, extremely accurate, digital scale. 12 pounds. My favorite dresses still fit like they always have. 12 pounds. I'm still exceptionally healthy and energetic; I still go walking every day, and bike riding on Sundays. 12 pounds. I still sing along with the overhead radio at the grocery store as I dance my cart full of nutritious food down the aisles and toddlers join in my fun! 12 pounds.

12 pounds. My loved ones have always thought I am beautiful, regardless of my weight. 12 pounds. I still look 15 years younger than I actually am, or so people tell me. 12 pounds. My friends still want to go places with me, to see and be seen. 12 pounds.

12 pounds. I'm still kindhearted and curious and fun to be with - 12 POUNDS! I'm still the kind of person who judges people by the content of their character, not the look and size of their body. TWELVE POUNDS. I still love my curves and can't imagine being drawn any other way but the way I am. TWELVE MOTHERFLAKING POUNDS! So why...why, in spite of all of these positive, wonderful things about me, why does my self-esteem - my very sense of self-worth - oscillate with the number on a scale?

Why do I suddenly feel like the most beautiful woman in the world for discovering that my bathroom scale weighs me 12 pounds too heavy?

KJM
08.16.2020

Recipe: Spicy Black Bean and Oat Veggie Burgers

As you may recall from reading previous posts to this blog, I love meat. I generally don't eat a lot of it, for a variety of reasons - a family history of heart disease being the biggest one - but I am in no way a vegetarian or a vegan, nor do I have the desire to become one; however, I am an omnivore and I do enjoy many vegetarian and vegan dishes, one of the simplest being the humble yet versatile veggie burger.

Veggie burgers can be made from tofu, beans, mushrooms, oats and other grains. They can be made vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, chunky or smooth. Depending on your preference, they can be made mild or spicy, with an Italian flair, Asian fusion, or Southwest spice - whatever you like; there is no wrong flavor!

I discovered my perfect veggie burger while a college student, back in the early 1990's; it was oat and egg based, not soy-based, crunchy on the outside but soft on the inside, and tasted good with ketchup. Because it contained eggs as a binding agent, vegans could not eat it; after a protest, the school dining service switched to a soy-based veggie burger which I could not eat (soy allergies!) and thus ended my foray into meat substitutes.

Fast forward to middle age and suddenly meat substitutes are all the rage again, as Generation X is watching its cholesterol while Generations Y and Z are flexing their ecological conscience to effect change in the grocery store. While there is now a wide variety of veggie burgers to choose from, the whole "beyond meat" program is still "beyond budget" for many shoppers. I recently caught a sale on black beans, and decided to pull together this "Spicy Black Bean and Oat Veggie Burger" recipe...and by spicy I mean as spicy as you want to make it; I prefer to let each flavor give the burger just a little peck on the cheek as opposed to a full-blown kiss, so feel free to adjust the spice levels upward as you please.

Spicy Black Bean and Oat Veggie Burgers

Ingredients

2 (15 oz. cans) black beans, drained and rinsed

¾ cup uncooked regular rolled oats (instant or old-fashioned)

2 tsp. garlic powder

2 tsp. onion powder

2 tsp. celery salt

1 tsp. chili powder

1/4 tsp. ground black pepper

1 Tbsp. soy sauce

4 Tbsp. cooking oil, divided (I like toasted sesame oil, but any oil will do)

4 sandwich buns

Sauces/garnishes as desired (salsa, mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, lettuce, tomato, etc.)

Directions

Put all ingredients except sandwich buns, sauces/garnishes and 2 Tbsp. cooking oil into food processor bowl and mix on high for 30 seconds. Scrape down the sides of the bowl, and pulse for 30 seconds more. Remove mixture from bowl and place on cutting board or waxed paper. (As always, if you do not have a food processor you can mash the mixture by hand).

Divide mixture into 4 evenly sized balls and shape into patties (if you prefer thin burgers you can do as many as 8, just serve on smaller buns). Let stand at room temperature for 5 -10 minutes before cooking; if not cooking right away, wrap with waxed paper, store in a plastic bag and refrigerate or freeze (just remember to defrost them in the fridge, not on the counter-top).

To cook: Heat frying pan and remaining 2 Tbsp. cooking oil to medium heat; cook burgers for 3 - 4 minutes per side. Overcooking will cause the oats to burn.

Once cooked, the look and texture of the veggie burgers is very similar to hamburgers; the spice level in these burgers makes them tasty enough that you won't miss the meat!

KJM
08.12.2020